Originally posted on Yahoo 360 on Friday January 18, 2008 - 04:33pm (CST)
Mistress, and i were talking the other night, and i asked her if she had remembered to send me an invitation to another of her spanking groups. She said. "No I didn't. I'll just go into the goodboy account, and put you in the group." Oooh!! A thrill went up my back! i wanted to kneel immediately. It was as if she had picked me up by the scruff of my neck, and set me down where she wanted me to be. god i felt so submissive!
We will be in the middle of a pleasent conversation, something i say trys her patience, her voice takes on this edge....".Hmmmmp." i whimper. "yes maam." conversation resumes. i am in my place. And usually i am so excited! A brief scolding from mistress..oooh! i can't describe the feeling. A bit of fear mixed with joy?
I fear her anger. i respect her discipline. But her displeasure, or worse dissappointment cuts me like a knife. What she thinks of me means everything to me. I have changed lifelong attitudes for her. my core personality remains. I am still me. But now i filter everything i say publicly through her expectations. i will not bring reproach on Mistress. And i have changed the way i think to the better. mistress will have tolerence. She will brooke no hate. i may not like you, but i must respect your right to your views. This was a struggle for me, and i still stumble. but i am trying very hard mistress.
I am spoiled rotten. I am protected. I am patiently nurtured. I am strictly disciplined. What a perfect blend of tenderness, and teeth! One moment basking in her silvery laughter, the next on fire with the red stripes of her displeasure. Always fair, but never comprimising. I am learning to do as i'm told at all times. This is as it should be. I know my place. it is naked, kneeling, eyes down. Her voice in my heart forever.
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